What We've Dipped
This section is all about what we've personally dipped in cheese. We'll try and be specific in the description with regards to brand / color / flavor if such a thing makes a difference in the final score. Aside from the description, we'll rate each dip on a scale of one to ten, based on no other criteria besides whatever we feel like doing. That's the beauty of being in charge around here.
Cat Treat (Greenie) - 1.5/10Added 08.21.2009
It's no wonder why cats are so pissy towards their owners if this is the kind of crap that they have to look forward to when they're rewarded. Oh, good kitty, you did something wonderful. Have this horrible-tasting treat that I bought for you. That's like taking your friend out to lunch and force-feeding them a used Dr. Scholls foot pad. Yeah, it's that bad. No amount of cheese could salvage this dip from being anything less than gross.
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Glazed Walnut - 6/10Added 08.21.2009
To be honest, it's very hard not to be biased when doing our work. Sometimes you see what is next up for dipping and you automatically know that you're going to hate it. We REALLY don't care for walnuts. Maybe as much as the guy who is allergic to them but it's pretty close. So, why did this dip get a 6? Because we like to keep an open mind about things. (We're thinking that we just put too much cheese on this dipped and simply hoped that we wouldn't taste the walnut.)
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Italian Seasoned Crouton - 8/10Added 08.21.2009
Bread and cheese go very well together. If you make your bread really old and stale, it still goes really well with cheese. If you get the brilliant idea to season your old, stale bread with Italian seasonings, we won't complain because it still goes really well with cheese.
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Rotini (uncooked) - 8/10Added 08.21.2009
Look, let's face it: we're all very busy people. Sometimes you're hungry but you just don't have time to make a complete meal. Besides, cooking pasta is overrated and water is expensive. Why not just skip straight to adding sauce? Preferably cheese sauce. Just be sure to schedule a dentist visit afterward because you'll be in for a very crunchy time.
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Cat Food (Dry) - 3.5/10Added 08.21.2009
You would think that we had already sampled all of the food in the world for the amount of times that we've already dipped pet food in cheese. You would also think based on our frequency that there must be something good about it. Well, you would be wrong. We're doing it for science and nothing more because this stuff tastes like shit.
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Grape Tomato - 6/10Added 08.21.2009
They say that two wrongs don't make a right and we would like to add to that that combining the names of two fruits don't make it taste any better. Despite the fact that the grape tomato fared relatively well during our taste test, we'd prefer to think that was just the cheese doing its job: making horrible things taste better.
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Cheez-It (White Cheddar) - 7.5/10Added 08.21.2009
We've already established that dipping cheese into more cheese is never a bad thing. The convenience of a cheese-flavored cracker simply makes the dipping process that much easier and we don't have to get our hands as messy. Yes, we're looking at you, Mentos.
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Banana - 5/10Added 08.21.2009
You know that you've become just a little bit jaded when you're pleasantly surprised by something that only garners a 5 rating. Why the surprise? Well, we just assumed that since this was fruit, it was fall under the same disgusting category as all of the other fruits after we dipped them in cheese. Much to our shock, pairing cheese with a banana only sucked a little bit, as opposed to sucking a lot like, say, apples did. We're still not sure if this is really a good thing or not.
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Mint Milano - 4/10Added 08.06.2009
Apparently not learning our lesson from the mint Mentos dip earlier (or the countless other sugar-infused foods that we so hate), we decided to feed our sweet tooth once again and the results are probably as you have guessed: not good. We really need to invest in a huge banner to hang in our dipping quarters that reminds us how awful candy and desserts taste when dipped in cheese. Chances are we won't pay any attention to it but at least we can say that we told ourselves so.
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Sesame Bread Stick - 5/10Added 08.06.2009
It's a bread stick. With sesame seeds on it. It's a pretty average food that garnered a pretty average score. We know that we're supposed to be creative here but we're doing the best with what we have to work with. Seriously.
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